Monday, May 21, 2007
Introducing....... OSCAR
This is our new addition to our family, his name is Oscar. I got him last week, and I just love him. He's so funny. We ended up naming him Oscar, because he's not real fond of the dogs.... so he sits on his hind legs and punches them. Hence, Oscar.... after my FAVORITE boxer in the world.... (and the best looking, I might add) Oscar delaHoya!!!
Wednesday, May 9, 2007
Monday, May 7, 2007
Best Song EVER!
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Life in general
On a bright side... I have a huge order for some of my crafts. I'm excited, as it couldn't have come at a better time! Hopefully, this will let me get my mind and my heart healed.
Here's my post: Subject: Life goes on within you and without you”
“Dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go; be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you want to do.”
Well, I’m back from 4 days in the “Triad”… Mark had school from Monday to Thursday in Greensboro, and I tagged along. The first night was spent at “Motel Hell” which sat atop of Walton’s Mountain. (Long story… just ask if you want to know the details). Then on Monday morning we moved to the Biltmore Suites Hotel. Really awesome place, if anyone is ever in the Greensboro/High Point/Winston Salem area (hence… the Triad), I would highly recommend it.
Then, I spent Monday through Thursday doing a lot of work on a craft catalog/brochure listing all of my craft items, worked on trying (the keyword here is TRYING) to set up an actual website, and finally…. doing a lot of soul searching; which has allowed me to pretty much come to a new outlook on life in general. I really should have done this sooner, because I actually feel better now about a great deal of things that were bothering me emotionally. After the last falling/passing out/hospital stay scare, I definitely needed to put a lot of problems and issues in God’s hands. This is what I’ve done.
I have also really been missing my Mom a lot more than usual lately and thinking about her a lot. I can’t believe that she will have been gone 7 yrs this September. I did a lot of thinking about how she would handle these issues. I KNOW exactly what she would have done; but I won’t do it her way. Only because I am tire, oh so tired, of the confrontation, the blaming, the accusing…. There is one thing that I do know, and that is that Mom would have confronted the issue and won, she would have came out of it screaming and fighting… but she would have won! In all honesty though, can you ever win when it’s a matter of the heart? NO! Especially when that heart (like mine), has been scarred beyond recognition. What does one do when the heart will no longer fight? When the fight has been literally sucked right from your body? Well, I don’t know about everyone else… but in my case… I will pick myself off, and continue on the daily battle. I have to, because there are other people in my life who love me, need me and are counting on me. The source of the “scars” will always be loved by me…. More than my own life…. And more than can ever be put into words or actions.
I also have realized here lately that some people are bigger in death than they were in life…. While others are simply gone and forgotten. This is in itself a very heartbreaking realization. One, that if pondered upon, will make you wonder why do we spend our time here on Earth giving our hearts and souls to those we love only to be forgotten when the casket closes??? And why do we spend our lives loving, supporting, cherishing, and helping… to have people walk away and never look, back never call, and never say thank-you?
My Dad will be 78 years old on the 11th of this month. Over the course of my life I’ve butted heads with him on so many occasions, I’ve been mad as hell at him, and have swore that I would never speak to him again. But, it brings me to tears to think of losing him. Over the past 4 ½ - 5 years, he has gone from just being my father to now being my friend…. My hero. He is a man who has been through a lot and seen a lot in his lifetime. And, looking back on the 42 years that I’ve been a part of his life, I’ve seen him go through a lot. I’ve seen him laugh, and I’ve seen him cry. I’ve watched him bury the woman that he spent 54 yrs with, watched him bury all of his siblings and his mother. I’ve seen him go through the highs and the lows. I’ve seen him so mad at me that I thought he would beat the snot out of me, and I’ve seen him lower his eyes in pain, because he feels forgotten. But, he has always loved me, he may not say it like I wish, but he loves me. Now that Mom’s gone, and I am not able to thank her, tell her I’m sorry for the screw ups, and tell her that I love her. I make it a point to tell these things to Dad. Because one day, I won’t be able to.
I remember asking someone once if it was possible to die from a broken heart. I don’t remember the answer I got…. But I do know what I believe. I believe that it is possible, because the hateful things that were said to me and about me over the course of the last few years and weeks had brought me down to the point that I sat and begged God to stop the pain by letting me leave this world. A broken will never fully heal, but with time it will quit hurting so bad. TIME…. A word that no one knows how much of it they have. I never realized what an amazingly powerful word it is.
On a person to person note…. I do not deserve this from you. You are the one who has bad mouthed me, trashed me, and expects me to take it. I NEVER once said that you screwed up your life, that you were not happily married, or anything remotely close to that. You are the one who “assumed” that’s what I meant and went and told everyone that I said it. (When I NEVER said that). I also NEVER said that your life turned out bad, that you weren’t happy or you weren’t in love. Those were things that YOU ASSUMED when I made the comment that maybe your father and I should have given you a little more discipline. I have never said that having Austin was a mistake. I would NEVER say that. Ask anyone who hears me talk about him…. And you can also ask them while you’re at it about me saying you getting married was a mistake. They will ALL tell you that I love that baby, and I love you and your husband…. And I am proud of the two of you. They will also tell you that I constantly say that I am proud of the woman/mother/wife that you’ve become.
If I thought you getting married was a mistake I sure as hell wouldn’t have came Florida, taken every last penny that Mark and I had saved up out of the bank, and spent 90% of it on you! I sure as hell wouldn’t have given you the money to buy the wedding ring he wanted, instead of the one you could afford. I sure as hell wouldn’t have bought you over $100 worth of items from Victoria’s Secret for your wedding night. It wasn’t/isn’t Mark’s place to pay for those items… but he did, because he knew that it was something that I wanted to do, thinking it would make you happy, NO WE wanted to make you happy. We never asked for anything in return… all we wanted was a simple “thank you, I love you”. I NEVER asked you to pay me back for any of the money that I spent on you that weekend. But, maybe I should have… maybe then you would have respected and appreciated what I did a little more.
You asked me who I was to judge? Well who are you to judge? You’ve judged me for over 4 years, and you know you have. Everyone knows you have. When I’ve tried to sit down and talk with you about it, you won’t talk about it, you just blow me off.
You are my daughter, and I love you more that you will ever begin to realize. I thought maybe when you had your son you would realize how much a mother loves a child.
Garden Stone
Angels II
Angels
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
Been a rough one....
Well, spent the night in the hospital last week. I passed out/blacked out and fell, had to call Mark at work to come and help me get up. They said I had a severe electrolyte imbalance, and a severe sinus infection. So I spent most of last week in bed. Have been working this week on some garden rocks. I'm addicted to this engraving thing! Not much has been going on because I haven't felt that well. I go to the doctor today, so we'll see what he has to say. I have a list about a foot long of questions for him. He'll just love me!
Mark has to go to Greensboro for school next week. I think I'm going to tag along and relax in the hotel. Let Covington give me a lil vacation!
This is the garden stone that I'm currently working on!
Monday, April 16, 2007
Tony Stewarts Hurse
Saturday, April 14, 2007
Dale Jr's camaro
Unexpected
I love having company but give me a notice!!! Is that so wrong to ask???
Friday, April 13, 2007
What to do next!
Well, now that I've engraved 2 very different slates, I'm addicted. I have a ton of thank you cards that I need to make, but just don't have the umph to go do it. So, I guess I'll be working on some slates for a while. I did get an order for the bar and shield one, and another order for an etched Harley in glass, so that will keep me busy and hopefully, give me some inspiration to get back to stamping.
On another note, this is a new pic of Austin. He looks so onry!
HD Slate finished
Harley Slate
Monday, April 9, 2007
Old Car
Trent Tomlinson
Saturday, April 7, 2007
Pic on last post~
NATIONAL CHAMPS BABY!!!!
I need .......
Not so bad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thursday, April 5, 2007
Unreal!!!!
Wednesday, April 4, 2007
Updating
On March 17th, my sister in law Patricia "Trish" Lynn Kyer passed away in her sleep. This was very unexpected and a total shock. I am at a major loss, as Trish and I were close. I can't even write about it right now.
I've been in a creative block, and have to force myself to even open the door of the craftroom. That's awful. I am working on an engraved slate in rememberance of Trish, and will post pics when it's done.
Kassie, (middle daughter) will be arriving this afternoon to spend the rest of her spring break with me. She and I will be working on her graduation announcements and going to look at prom dresses. Other than that, we're going to be having some good one on one time. Youngest daughter, (Kourtney) will be in Disney World for a Cheerleading National competition. I would have loved to have went, but just not physically and financially able right now. :(
Updating
On March 17th, my sister in law Patricia "Trish" Lynn Kyer passed away in her sleep. This was very unexpected and a total shock. I am at a major loss, as Trish and I were close. I can't even write about it right now.
I've been in a creative block, and have to force myself to even open the door of the craftroom. That's awful. I am working on an engraved slate in rememberance of Trish, and will post pics when it's done.
Kassie, (middle daughter) will be arriving this afternoon to spend the rest of her spring break with me. She and I will be working on her graduation announcements and going to look at prom dresses. Other than that, we're going to be having some good one on one time. Youngest daughter, (Kourtney) will be in Disney World for a Cheerleading National competition. I would have loved to have went, but just not physically and financially able right now. :(
Monday, February 26, 2007
I knew better.....
I've been working on locating people in my graduating class for our 25 yr reunion next year. This will be the first year that I'm not in town to co-chair. That's bothering me too.... So, I'm doing what I can to help by spending hours online emailing and looking up addresses. We had a class of around 600, so this will keep me busy for a while. But, it's not going to be the same. When we did our 20 year, I had so much fun catching up with everyone at the reunion meetings. But, I won't be able to go home for all the meetings this year. I am going to try and be at the first one, and maybe will be able to do one here and there. But, I don't know.
Thursday, February 22, 2007
He's a genius
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Sunday, February 18, 2007
My Little Race Fan
Sunday Ramblings....
This is one of the pictures that miraculously reappeard frm my digital camera. This is me and Austin the day I was leaving to come back to NC from Florida.....
I spent all day yesterday in bed. I woke up with another migraine, when Mark came in around 1:00 from work I had him take me to Urgent Care.... they gave me a shot in each butt cheek.... one of tordal and one of phenegren. Came home, ate a sandwich and was out until about 9 p.m. Then I tried to watch some tv, but the lights hurt my eyes, so I went back to bed and slept until this morning. Migraine is gone, but now I feel hung over. I'll take the hang over feeling compared to the migraine feeling. Will spend today in the recliner, probably crocheting while watching the Daytona 500!
Mark delivered the Lucas name frame yesterday, and they LOVED it. I wish I knew how to get more orders on these. I love making them. The only problem that I've had so far is getting the frames. My dollar tree hasn't had any of them since about a week before Christmas. I stocked up then, but am down to 5 frames.
Debi is wanting me to help with baby shower invites. So I will be getting with her either this week or next weekend and working on those. I need to check with Tara and see if she has the "fishy friends" and "silly sealife" stamps from stampin up. Those will match the new mommy's nursery theme perfect.
Have been giving a LOT of thought to becoming a demo for stampin up. I just don't have the $199 right now, and don't have enough stampin up stamps to do the mini kit. I have a few sets, but not many. I really thought about asking dad for the money, but know he'll complain... i think it would be a great birthday present.... don't you? LOL.
Well, need to get off of here and get a few things done before the 500! GO MATT!!!!
Thursday, February 15, 2007
Name frame
Freakin' Out
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Valentine's Day
I've been crocheting all day yesterday, and will probably work some more on that today. My friend has breast cancer and has lost her hair to chemo.... so I've been making her some chemo caps. Her birthday is next week, and I thought that would be a great present. Plus, since I am in a creative block when it comes to stamping, I thought this would be a good break!
Not much on the agenda for today, will probably end up doing some laundry and the normal picking up. And then will try to get a couple birthday cards done, and then crochet. So much for the exciting life.....
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Tuesday....
Friday, February 9, 2007
It's Friday!
I'm starting to get a little restless. I feel at days like the walls of the house are closing in on me. I went yesterday and just walked around Target for something to do and somewhere to go. And to top it all off, I feel like I'm in a creative slump. I've done a couple of cards, but I don't like them. I hope this passes... I hate just standing in the door to the craft room and having no idea what I want to go do.
Practice for NASCAR starts tonight, at 4:00. I'm glad! At least I'll have that to occupy my time.
Thursday, February 8, 2007
Wednesday, February 7, 2007
This is a card I did for a weekly challenge on Ink-stains. I've never done a challenge before, and did this one and signed up to do a "girly girl" one. I'm still struggling with that one.
The stamp I believe is either hero arts or inkadoodles.... I'm not sure. (I took the plastic tag off a long time ago, because it was peeling) I do know that I got it at Hobby Lobby.It's colored and shaded with my prisma pencils. I just love the way it turned out.
Tuesday, February 6, 2007
BRRR! It's cold!
It's 24 degrees here.... to me that's way too dang cold!
Didn't get much accomplished yesterday, I finished Kayla & Eric's anniversary card, and that's about it. Today I have a huge list of things to get done. Including trying to come up with something girly girl for a monthly card contest, 7 bday cards to finish the month of February & the rest of my Valentines. I hope to accomplish something today.
Saturday, February 3, 2007
Austin
Have been working on Valentine's this week. Have a couple Anniversary cards that need done and several birthday cards.
Nothing much going on this weekend. Having some friends over for the big game on Sunday. I've got to get the sweeper ran and all of that fun stuff. YUCK!
I'm supposed to go to Heather's tonight for a pure romance party, not sure if I feel up to going. It will all depend on how late Mark works today. I never see him. :(
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
Today will be spent playing on here, and working on Valentine's, and Bday cards. I am also in the process of making my own address book, will post pics when I'm done. I made a list last night of things I needed to do today, and I've done decided it's way too long! I don't know why I do that to myself, I make the list.... then the next morning look at it and think YUCK I don't want to do any of that. So I just end up throwing it away.
Off to get some things done!
I did it!
Tomorrow on the agenda is to finish this thing, and work on valentine's and bday cards for February.
Until then....
This is a bday card I made for my best friend back in WV.
Outside: We could always wear paper bags over our heads to hide our age. Of course, then everyone would think we're weird. Would you rather be old or weird?
Inside: RIGHT! Get the scissors and we'll cut out the eye holes.
I think she'll really get a kick out of this.